Deus ex machina
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
I’m hoping against hope somehow, somewhere, somewhat is going to pop out of the blue cheese and make things easier for me. But, that is only a fool’s dreams, a fool with no direction in life atm, save the constant ramblings of my destructive mind. This is the beginning of the tragic falling of an ignorant fille. The crumbles of the cookie is turning into dust.
And even the ants won’t touch it.
The crux of the matter is that I am at my weakest point. Attack me now and you shall see me cry rather than defiantly defend myself with the little dignity that I have left. And pretty soon, roaches will be seen scurrying around, eating me from the inside out, as my body rots and fouls the stagnant air with the stench of despair rather than fiery anger or vengeance. I wonder how my innards taste like after all the centuries of substance abuse (ajinomoto), hardcore drinking (unpurified water) and restlessness (hormones not getting enough attention).
My “educated” guess is that they taste like chicken.
Lest I know what else to do, I am too distraught to do anything more than to worry my ass off about it all the time. I am THAT unmotivated.
I am the professional cynic who doesn’t get paid in silver, but with rusted spoons that fed the angry and constipated pus-y maggots that once gnawed on the syphilis-ridden nymphomaniac daughters of Delilah. Life is that bleak, the moon is shinning on the wrong part of town and I think I’m barking at the wrong tree. Stupid cacat mofos at the JPA won’t even reply my emails. I sent them emails both in English and Malay and boy, have I discovered the ugly truth that my Malay is not as good as it used to be. Maybe I should have coloured my Malay email with some machauhaianjingkurapmatiterkangkangpunyalanchiaulumakanikanbilisbasitengah
malamterhegehhegehdekatjambanklcc to make their lives more interesting in that stuffy uninspired bumiputera-laden office with cheap plastic furniture that even 20-sen brothels can’t stoop low enough themselves to buy. One or two of them can choke on the cucumber slice in their nasi lemak for all I care!
Gah!!
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Currently Playing
Infest
By Papa Roach
Last Resort
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Posted 1/18/2005 at 8:40 PM - email it
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5 Comments
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Visit fuzzynerd’s Xanga Site!
Deng dit lei charboh.
*HUG*
Posted 1/24/2005 at 10:42 PM by fuzzynerd
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my eyes too small mah.. :P
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